What I wanted

Description:

What I wanted, the only thing I asked you for, was the one thing you wouldn’t give. You knew that this kind of love is a fickle thing. Easily destroyed by jealousy, corrupted by greed, blackened by doubt. My fear of loosing and getting lost, you protected me. I was so weak, I had let life grind me down. You wore your pain with dignity, I wore mine like a dress of thorns. That is why I don’t like when people touch me, it hurts too much. I could never explain this, only you would understand how it is to have love that shines from the very core. To love even the wicked and twisted, to love even when you don’t want to. There is no stopping it. We have to do everything in our power, use all means to conceal it. Its sucking the energy to keep this veil, this protective shell up. The sun from inside blackens the cask, gives it a hard surface that has a smell of burnt flesh. Tumours start to grow and spread like leafs falling in the autumn. I want to peel that shell off you, little by little. Let me put my hands around that sun of yours, let me put my cheek against it. I am a snowfox from the north, I have a cold that can calm that sun, not to put it out, just to keep it from scarring you. I know that you have learned how to live with the pain, I know you will never crack. Never had I seen a statue like yours. From the moment you walked in that door, you shook my ground and I would stay affected by the vibrations in the statue I had built for myself. At night I would put my hands up against the walls and hum to the waves they sent pulsating in the air. None of us will break, but the world needs us. We have to find a way out of our prisons before they all loose their way.